So apparently my old blog got deleted, don't know how why or when but its existance is cyberspace is no more, or not that I can find anyway. That aspect of the internet really scares me, you post your life to a site like facebook or myspace, and then one day it just ceases to exist. Let me suggest the unthinkable, facebook might break down, brides would lose their wedding photos, their scanned in faded family pictures, photos of loved ones, messages from loved ones. I have automatic backup software on my laptop, because I lost all my music, and poetry through one swift swipe of my macbook onto the floor, the situation actually ripped me to pieces, i felt lost without my history i'm never doing that again!
Onto more pressing matters, that are pressing on my mind so much right now that I feel it might implode.. long distance relationships. Ah the LDR's everyone has a different view of them, some of us are in one, some wish we were in one, some avoid and wouldn't touch them with long pointy objects i.e bargepoles, or maybe something more modern..lightsabers?
I've had a very good education on the LDR's (i'm making them sound a bit like drugs..) now this may seem a very narrow minded view, I don't mean to offend or anger people who are long distance lovers, it can be a great thing, a special special treasured thing, but I know that I could never do it myself.
I'm breaking it down to the basics here, long distance love can turn into obsession, paranoia. you're always wondering where they are, that good looking girl just poked them on facebook now you're in tears with a tub 'o' hagen Daaz wondering where it all went wrong. The distance does distance us! It does make us worry, espescially if you're in a wee fledgling relatioship, because how the heck do you know your partners boundaries? How can you tell that look in their eye over skype, over an instant message? And another question, how can you live your life without that big part of your life?
I feel I sound cynical, I'm still in a relationship with the woman that I LDR'd (heh heh) all last summer, lets just say summer last year = torture. Jobless, directionless, confused it was not a good mix! However having someone who I could talk to on the phone every night really helped, and I think to be honest, if that person had been there I may of been tempremental with them, snapped, cried all the stuff that you don't want to offload on someone everyday.
I admit sometimes we'd be having a lovely conversation and I'd be like "god I just want her here to kiss damnit!" but on the bright side, I never worried, I never thought "oh god she's going out on the piss this will be the doomsday for our love" I trusted her, something that made me appreciate her so much more, and she trusted me. We would talk pretty much everyday, me lieing on the grass with my legs crossed and the phone pressed against my ear so it felt like she was right next to me..it became a nice ritual for us, I would call her after i'd gotten home from work, it was nice I could cope, but nice only works for so long... nice isn't human skin or play fighting nice is bearable, just.
But for those of you who are struggling to keep the LDR fresh :-
- Watch a film with eachother over the phone or on skype, laugh at it together cry at it together (creepy horror films are not advised), recreate being there with them.
- Send eachother small gifts/letters in the post, it'll leave them smiling and thinking about you all day.
- Do something romantic for them and take a picture of it to send them. Write your names in the sand, etch them onto a tree, arrange pebbles in a heart shape whatever the heck you wanna do but again it'll remind them that you're thinking of them always.
Night World, Beijos xXx
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